—I’m not really an extremist. If you’re reading this glorious blog for the first time, you must understand that “Right-Wing Extremist Views” is a mockery of Obama’s obsession with and paranoia of conservatives. You’re welcome.
—On the other hand, I very much dislike liberals. I’m neither obsessed with them nor fear them. I just don’t freaking like them under any circumstance whatsoever.
—I apologize for not posting lately. I’ve been working my ass off. That’s what Republicans do. We work.
—I was quite bored with all the debt talk. Then, when S&P downgraded the U.S. economy from AAA to AA+, I laughed out loud: “Obama, you dumbass!”
—Make no mistake: This is Obama’s economy. No longer can he blame it on Bush and the GOP.
—And what’s great about that is when a Republican wins the White House in 2012, the president-elect can talk ad nauseum about “inheriting this economy,” taking a page from liberals’ playbook.
—Stupid liberals.
—You’re probably asking yourself why I talk so much about liberals. It’s simple: They run amok in Washington, control the mainstream media, kill unborn babies, invent global warming, manufacture crises, force homosexual marriage down the throats of God-fearing people, and hug trees. You need more reasons?
—Okay. Here’s another: They’re retarded.
—I still try like hell to keep up with the news so I won’t miss an opportunity to laugh at Obama and his evil followers. But damn it, I have to also work like hell right now to pay my portion of the national debt.
—I’m with Dennis Miller on this one: If we actually owe somebody that money, fuck em. We just won’t pay it.
—Elect me to the White House in 2012, and I guarantee the national debt will be wiped out in about 16 minutes.
—As president, I would also promise the largest military build-up in American history. Fuck that. It would be the largest military build-up in the history of THE WORLD.
—Then I would use it to destroy our enemies.
—Ever notice how big the moon appears in the night sky sometimes? Me, too. What does that mean? Shit, not a damn thing. I just wanted to put that out there.
—That recall of Republicans in Wisconsin didn’t go so well. When are these liberal pricks gonna realize people prefer Republicans to Democrats — except in San Francisco and New York?
—Oh, San Francisco. You filthy bastards. You should be ashamed of yourselves.
